Thursday, March 10, 2016

Habrá Sangre: La Hora Cero

 Habrá Sangre was on Sunday, it was pretty epic.  Everything in italics are things that happened In The Ring.
The player characters were:


El Mini Grande - The leader of Lucha Libre Sin Fronteras' mini locker room and one of the head trainers, he was once the compatriot of El Grande - the promotion's perennial champion.   Having sacrificed his mask to save El Grande's martial pride, he now feels betrayed and gone rudo y yanqui in retaliation.  No matter where the LLSF pitches its tent, El Mini Grande has a malicious legion of black hearted little people at his beck and call.


Tornado Rosado -"Rose Tornado"- El Grande's daughter and bearer of his legacy, Tornado wishes to reunite her father and El Mini Grande.  Driven by a strong sense of justice, Tornado Rosado is a role model to her Tornado Scouts and wears the Mask of the South Wind.


Tobillo Largo -"Long Ankle"- A relative newcomer,  she earned her ring name after she gained the upper hand in her debut match with El Diablo Abismo and retired him after he refused to submit to her ankle lock.  Under the mask she is a medical doctor raising money to keep the doors of her family's free clinic open. Her iron grip is not to be trifled with.

 El Chupacabra - "The Goatsucker"- Literally the legendary cryptid.  While he rarely wins, the creature in funerary garb doesn't fail to entertain. The last of his kind, he seeks the attentions of Tobilla Largo as a salve to his loneliness.

The session opened in a smoke-filled writer's room, deep in the bowels of the Monterrey Sports Arena, the night before La Hora Cero - LLSF's biggest show of the year.  Personnel shortages had rendered the previously planned bookings unworkable, the legendary luchadors and the PC's had attended a dinner party at Dory Blanchard's mansion and not returned.  Motivated by loyalty to Serafina Alonzo the writers booked the show to punish the most outspoken members of the locker room:

Trios Championship - Fuerza Aerea Magnifica vs. Los Mensajores De Muerte- Los Mensajores was booked to win and are consolidated under the leadership of El Diablo Abismo as Los Mensajores Del Diablo.

Triple Threat Elimination - Aguila Ayudas Jr. vs. The Executioner vs The Mad Monk- The new kid was booked to defeat the two men responsible for his father's prideful fall.

Flipper, the seal boy, knocked on the door and told the staff that Tobillo Largo, El Chupacabra and El Mini Grande were all seen returning to the staging grounds.  The writers immediately included them on the card.

Women's Championship - Tobillo Largo vs. Las Hermanas Extranas - Elimination match, Tobillo Largo was a shooter and thus less exciting in the ring.  She was booked to lose to the 3 brujas.

Cage Match - Chupacabra vs. Buffalo Ramos - The Foul Thing's infatuation with Tobillo Largo could be counted on interfere with her Women's Championship match.  In preemptive punishment he was booked to face "The Rough Beast" Buffalo Ramos and fall to Ramos' Extremo La Pista.

Fatal 4 Way - El Mini Grande's 4 most valuable minis all enter the ring, only the winner keeps his job.

Lucha de apuesta - El Grande vs El Diablo Abismo - Mask vs mask, with El Grande returning for his retirement match, it was fitting for him to to go under, unmasked by Serafina's husband.

Mega Championship - Carmelita "La Jugosa" vs The People's Champion - The writers came upon the grand idea to charge the audience for beads that they could drop in urns for each luchador, so they could be "involved" in booking the main event.  Of course this was worked and the staff planned to have Mariposa Asesina work Carmelita "La Jugosa" after rigging the outcomes.
Meanwhile, in the rough country surrounding Monterrey proper, a yankee doodled limousine sails over a cliff.  Crashing at the bottom of the gorge fire quickly spreads from the steel carcass.  Forcing their way out of the trunk Tobillo Largo, Tornado Rosado, and El Chupacabra drag an unconcious El Mini Grande from the wreck, unmasked and scalped respectively.  Swearing revenge on the traitorous Mad Monk, the four stagger out of the hills and towards the bright lights of the Monterrey.
 An old mission church sits atop a hill, redeeming what was once an Aztec place of worship.  Outside the sanctified wall a beleaguered man stumbles away from a freshly dug grave and makeshift cross.  Mumbling and lost, he heads back to "home" fearful for what he has caused to transpire. A hand rises slowly from the tilled soil, the scratched name "ALONZO" comes into focus on the cross.

That evening, La Hora Cero is set to begin and the crowd files in,  Mexica cunningmen ride in on a bus to sanctify the arena.  Smudging the area with smoke and preparing the arena for the Sport of the Gods. Monterrey Arena is brought into alignment with the Thirteen Heavens and ascends through Elysian climes.  Hallucinations and numinous experience wrack the crowd, one of the writers falls into madness while another goes to the police only to find himself in a holding cell to sleep off his crazy.


First match - trios - Fuerza Aerea Real vs Los Mesanjores de Muerto - The opening match was full of energy and Fuerza Aerea Real put up a helluva fight, but Los Mensajores won as booked. El Diablo Abismo came out of the back and rechristened them Los Mensajores Del Diablo. 

Meanwhile our intrepid luchadores approach the Arena, finding gates have been dropped and locked over the entrances & exits. El Chupacabra leads them through a sewer grate, passing his shrine to Tobillo Largo on their way.  Emerging from the underbelly they start seeking answers.
Triple threat elimination match - Aguila Ayudas Jr vs Mad Monk vs Executioner - The Mad Monk and The Executioner both do their job and go under to Aguila Ayudas Jr. The hot-blooded heart throb gets over with the crowd and several votes were cast in his favor.   The arena's ceiling retreated upward, raplaced by an expanse of stars - their attention palpable.

Backstage the 4 heroes split up: El Mini Grande seeks out Carlos Alonzo for an explanation, Tornado Rosado encountered the skinless corpse of an overweight man wearing the scalp of El Mini Grande, El Chupacabra grapples with a similar creature bearing his scalp beneath the ring, and Tobillo Largo pulverized her doppleganger - retrieving her mask in time for her match.

Women's championship - Tobillo Largo vs Las Hermana Extranas - Handicap elimination match.  Crestfallen that they would be facing the true Tobilla Largo rather than a familiar.  Able to keep her opponents grounded, Tobillo forced he match she wanted to have - grip to grip.  Through superior technical acumen she made quick work for the three brujas.  The witches' one opportunity to cheat was foiled by surreptitious interference from El Chupacabra.  Leading to Tobillo's clean sweep of Las Hermanas and securing her first Women's Championship.

In Carlos Alonzo's office, El Mini Grande confronts the boss' son with "Hermanito," an oversized revolver, drawn.  Demanding answers for what transpired up on the mountain and the Mad Monk, Carlos plead ignorance of what happened and sent someone to go get the Mad Monk.  Tornado Rosado entered the office bearing Mini Grande's scalp as the Mad Monk was made intimately familiar with Harmanito's interest in his nethers.
Cage match - Chupacabra vs Buffalo Ramos -With the cage not even lowered, Ramos went to work redecorating the arena with Chupacabra's ichors.  The canvas mat, ring apron and the front row were redyed to match the Goat Sucker's innards.  Chupacabra spied several strange, supernatural audience members in said front row.  El Chupacabra picked up the win by barely slithering out of a pin following Extrema De Pista.  Buffalo Ramos was incensed, tracked down El Chupacabra in the locker room making his displeasure known.

Cold gun barrel pressing up under his pelvis, the Mad Monk started spilling his metaphorical guts.  Explaining that everything that happened was at the direction of Pablo Jimenez and Vincente Alonzo's last will and testament.  A feeble knock echoes from the office door, cracking it open Tornado spies the beleaguered lawyer who was the root of all this.  Pulling him in, Jimenez quickly confesses everything: outlining Vincente Alonzo's failing health, disappointment in his children,  fears for the company, and desperate desire to cling to life.  Delving into the dark sorceries of the brujas, nagual, and the Smoking Mirror Vincente hatched a plan for life ever after by ascending to the Barren Throne while the gods' attention is diverted.  But to sit upon the mighty seat of Creation, Vincente must have the heart of a champion.

Tobillo comes across a crumpled Chupacabra and tries to help him out the best she can.  El Mini Grande  runs out to the ring because 4 of his workers were booked for the following match.

Fatal 4 way - Flipper vs Lagarto Saltando vs Consuela vs Sexy Eddie, all 4 managed by El Mini Grande - Winner keeps their job, losers get fired.  This was El Mini Grande's magnum opus as a rudo and a manager.  The match was a panoply of foreign objects, referee bumps, mistaken identity, replacement referees, trees of woe, and dirty blows.  Exhausting on the dirt tricks he had ever learned, El Mini Grande felt his left side go numb and signalled for Flipper to pin Sexy Eddie and take the win.

Simultaneously to the mini-free-for-all Tobillo, Chupacabra, and Tornado all ran to El Grande's private dressing room, the sounds of sobbing and tongue-lashing leaked through the door.  Inside El Grande was in tears, apologizing for all the lies as Tornado's  doppleganger berated him for the half-truths.  Tornado leapt to the defense of her father, her spinning heel kick making short work of the creature's rot-ripened skull.  Reclaiming the Mask of the South Wind she embraced her father and told him everything was fine.  Tobillo exhorted the Mad Monk to ward the dressing room against supernatural evil, hoping to deter Vincente's plan.  The defrocked priest decamped to his trailer to gather materials necessary.  El Grande protested being locked in his room because he had to go out and wrestle.  As his entrance music resounded through the building, Tornado Rosado pushed her father back and flew to the ring.  Her allies followed her, should Los Mensajores interfere.
Her father's intro music blaring, the crowd lost their shit when Tornado Rosado came out to defend her father's honor.
A heavy knock rocked El Grande's dressing room door.  Asking who was there, the living legend opened the door to a soft familiar voice and received an alien fist of stone.


Lucha de apuesta - El Grande Tornado Rosado vs El Diablo Abismo with El Mini Grande as special referee.  Telling the ageless story of the young, enthusiatic competitor facing the experienced, tricky veteran, El Diablo fought well for a man with only one good leg.  However he was outmatched by Tornado's speed and power, El Diablo was pinned quickly and willingly removed his mask.  Cementing the future rise of Tornado Rosado and securing her father's legacy.

Serafina Alonzo came out to the ring with the urns (which no one had a chance to rig), accompanied by Carmelita "La Jugosa" LLSF's Mega-Champion.  Commencing to vote counting the processing were interrupted by Remi Alonzo, dragging the hemorrhaging corpse of El Grande.  Robbed of his chance at revenge El Mini Grande called out El Grande's murderer from the back. 

His challenge was answered by a mountain.


El Grande's stolen heart beating in a stone cavity, Vincente Alonzo's rigid grin gave silent answers. Serafina stripped El Grande's corpse of his mask and donned it, attacking Tornado. The heroes fought against Los Mensajores and Serafina as Vincente charged the ring. Scaling the top rope and calling upon his Legion De Minis one last time, El Mini Grande peeled his scalp free and motioned for El Grande's mask. His vision blurred. 

A vast, regal throne congealed from starlight, filth, and kayfabe. Alonzo's eyes lit with greed. The ring became a grand altar. 

Covered in shadowy minis, his allies struck down by Tornado and company Vincente had only one goal: ascend the throne. Tornado whipped her father's mask from the usurper, Serafina, and threw it to her uncle, El Mini Grande. Tobillo gripped Vincente's vast ankle, rolling him into a bow and arrow, exposing his mountainous chest cavity. 
Pulling the mask over his bloody pate, El Mini Grande launched himself into El Tierramoto, the finishing move  he had forsaken, plucking his estranged friend's heart from the abomination's chest. As that stolen organ beat it's last rhythm, El Mini Grande's matched it beat for dying beat. 

Mega Championship Carmelita "La Jugosa" vs voted luchador Tornado Rosado.  Stunned by the death of her mentor and no match for the grief enraged  Tornado, Carmelita dropped the belt with minimal resistance. Crowning Tornado Rosado with her first Megachampionship.